Nights Influences

Each night I typically fall asleep listening to music, unaware that they are most likely influencing my dreams. The other night i was listening to The Beatles as I was falling asleep.  Once i slipped into unconsciousness I found myself in a foreign place surrounded by a bunch of people that all had similar features. All the woman were wearing dull red dresses with their hair pulled back in a tight bun where all the men were fuzzy and all i could really make out was their eye color. Each male had intense crystal clear blue eyes. For some reason the detail of all the men's eyes was the most dominant thing in my dream. As i looked deep into a mans eyes i was suddenly moved from being apart of the crowd to being above the crowd on a stage. The army of the redundant looking people all stared at me as if they were waiting for me to do something. but as I look around me there is nothing on the stage but me. I felt very confused because i did not know what everyone wanted of me. Then i looked around again and there was a single microphone right in front of me. I take to mic in my hand and begin to sing a song that i have never heard before. the crowd still stares at me like their im not pleasing them and like they want something more of me. I start to sing louder but then everything goes blank around me and my surroundings change. No longer am I on a stage but back in my room alone with the mic still in my hand. As I woke up I remembered that i feel asleep listening to music which most likely influenced my dream of being a performer. Its strange to me that by falling asleep to something you are able to transfer it into your dreams and turn it into something with your imagination.

dreams give hope

Over the weekend I had experienced a spontaneous adventure that I was not expecting to occur. Over the past couple of days a friend and I decided to hitch hike our way down to Laytonville in order to reach a music festival. Neither of us were prepared enough for the journey ahead of us, but fortunately everything fell into place. One night we happened to get stuck in a town called Fortuna because we were unable to hitch a ride that night. As we were lying in the tent I slow drifted to sleep and fell into a very hopeful yet bizarre dream. In the dream, my friend and I were out on a dry lake bed at the festival that we were trying to get to. There were large statues with many varieties of dull colors creating this glow around them. There were many people there, yet they all looked oddly similar. Everyone around was male and i happened to be the only female at the whole festival. We decided to explore the whole festival and as we were walking we finally realized that it was endless. Some how we were walking in circles tracing back the paths we have previously taken. We kept seeing the same statue with all the dull colors. Then everything feel very quite, and a faint voice began to sing. We both some how appeared next to the stage listening to the musicians play their song. we both became entranced with the music and could not break our concentration. Then the music came to a sudden stop and I woke up. I had forgotten that i was camped out and was a bit disoriented for a second. Although the dream was nothing like the carnival the fact that we had reached it in my dream gave me very high hopes and the extra push to keep going forward.

Anxiousness Lingers

As I am finally getting accustomed to my new life at Humboldt State my dreams make me feel that I am in fact anything but that. For the past few nights I had experienced reoccurring dreams. Although each night differed, there were many similarities that make me wonder if I am truly at ease here. In the first dream I find myself walking alone at night down in the plaza of Arcata. As I walk along the square the sun begins to diminish and storm like clouds roll in. I then begin to run up this never ending hill that eventually leads to a large cliff over looking the University.  I turn behind me and see the death clouds approaching quickly. For a second I see a large building out in the distance which then relocates me into a large empty city. Then it ended. When I woke up I had this constant feeling of uneasiness, like there was something that I needed to do. The next night a had a similar dream but with less detail. And instead of changing scenes to a empty city I was stuck on top of the cliff with no where to go. I feel that my subconscious is trying to tell me that I am not quite comfortable in my new environment. Maybe I am still trying to find a little piece of home in Arcata. After each dream I had this intense feeling of uneasiness, as if there was something extremely important that I needed to achieve. Maybe this is foreshadowing something in my future that I must over come and accomplish. I feel that dreams are an insightful way to look inside yourself and discover small details that you may have perviously over looked.

Sunday, 8/29/10

Last Sunday I experienced a dream like no other. It all felt so real, with emotions so vivid, which was the dream, and what was the truth. My dream began at my house, which looked nothing like my actual home, yet I still recognized it as my own. My parents were out of town for the weekend so I decided to invite some friends over. As the day turned to night we decided to buy some alcohol and have a small party. Just as the fun begins I hear my phone ring. When I answered I heard my mothers voice like I have never heard before. There was no emotion behind her words, i detected no smile in her voice. She softly mumbled, "Your father is dead." As that last word, "DEAD," entered my head it triggered emotions that I have never experienced. Immediately the whole scene around me had changed and I find myself on hill peering over a rock watching my father's funeral from afar. I see all the people that loved him surrounding his grave each holding a single lavender flower. I try to move my body to get closer to what will be the last time I would see my dad. But my body would not move, not even an inch. It felt as if I was bolted into the ground and forced to watch the most tragic event of my life all alone. As I continued to struggle I hear a faint voice speaking about my father's death. My dad has always been the type of person who does not believe in medical treatment and believes a positive spirt works just as well as medicine. As the voice continued I heard him speak about how my father had a very serious illness but failed to tell anyone thinking that his positive ora would cure him. The voice begins to fade, then all color begins to fade. The grave yard turns dull. I wake up to a very damp face. ApparentlyIi had been crying all throughout the dream. I quickly reached for the phone and called my dad in order to confirm that my dream was in fact just a dream.